Note To Self- IT’S OKAY TO BE “NOT OKAY”

I’m naturally a very emotional person, and if I’m allowed to brag, very emotionally aware. But society and circumstances have taught me that is not a very ‘acceptable’ trait; that it’s more appropriate to answer ” I’m fine” when you mean ” I’m tired, confused and I wanna tell you about how much my day sucked” .

It’s like people have become in a tune with the concept of being ‘lonely but not alone’. An average adult female has at least four friends who she often meets “for drinks” to talk about the latest fashion trends, her boyfriend’s new car and the new face cream that is pure magic. Never about their fears, insecurities, dreams, goals, ambitions….Never about the guy they are dating that isn’t really their type, but can afford expensive shoes and fancy dinners. Never about the job they hate but are still at it because it pays well; or what they would rather be doing that would be more fulfilling.

The result is a group of people who feel lonely even while being held close; a generation who wish at least once a weak to be given a chance to ‘do this life thing’ all over again, knowing what they know now.

I’m trying to say that it’s okay to be vulnerable, it doesn’t make you less strong; and if you are with someone who calls you weak for being honest once in a while, you need a new someone.

Advertisements

CHOICES

All the bad decisions I’ve made in this lifetime,

Were on those nights when we would drink fast and then talk slow

Those kinds of talks that felt intimate and made the air calm,

Even while sitting in a corner in a dingy crowded bar where the music was never on low.

And he would speak to me is a whisper with his lips to my ear so close,

The words would roll off in a drawl and would make me closer to draw.

But really we talked slow because, we were either too drunk to think fast, or giving our morals a moment to thaw.